....teman tapi mesra...

Emotional Affair?

alasan dari kawan-kawan...

Mr K.." we are just a good friend..teman tapi mesra..and i swear kita orang tak ada lebih-lebih..atau melepasi batas...just a simple kiss tu ada"

Mr J..."kita kawan "mesra"..ringan-ringan je..make love tak ade lagi..tapi percakapan,sms,email adalah...may be u can call it "on line sex" or "Sex di alam Maya"

itu sebahagian daripada contoh-contoh emotional affair..


The signs of an emotional affair may be more subtle than those of a sexual affair, but they're just as unmistakable.

"An emotional affair happens when you put the bulk of your emotions into the hands of somebody outside of your marriage," explains psychotherapist M. Gary Neuman,

Your innermost thoughts, funny jokes, and interesting personal experiences are saved up and spilled to the other woman /guy instead of your spouse.
And even if you never so much as touch her/him, this emotional attachment has just as much potential as a sexual fling to damage your marriage...


Once you're drawn into an emotional affair, it can feel so good that you don't want to stop.

In fact, not having sex may make the connection seem all the more powerful. It feels genuine, romantic even, and isn't easy to let go of because it's so "safe" — or so it appears.
But inevitably, you start unfairly comparing your wife/husband to this other woman/man,

Even after you've recognized your emotional affair and the damage it's causing your marriage, slamming on the brakes is easier said than done.


"Many emotional affairs turn almost obsessive simply because you never had sex to consummate your fantasies."

82% of affairs happen with someone who was at first "just a friend," according to noted infidelity researcher Shirley P. Glass.


Are You in an Emotional Affair?

YOU'VE PROBABLY CROSSED THE LINE IF you
• Pay extra attention to how you look before you see her/him.

• Think crush-like thoughts like, She/He'd love this song! she/he like this foods etc...

• Tell her/him more details about your day than you do your partner.


• No longer feel comfortable telling your wife/husband about this person and begin to cover up your relationship.


• Experience increasing sexual tension; you admit your attraction to her/him but also insist to yourself that you would never act on it.


IT'S ABOUT TO GET PHYSICAL WHEN YOU...
• Find yourself feeling vulnerable and turn to the other woman/man for support rather than to your wife/husband or a trusted relative or friend.

• Accelerate the level of intimacy through sexual or suggestive talk over e-mail or the phone.

• Put yourself in a situation where the two of you could be alone.


TO FORTIFY YOUR MARRIAGE...
• Stay honest with your wife/husband. Share with him all your hopes, triumphs, and failures — as well as your attractions and temptations, which will help keep you from acting on them.

• Make time for just the two of you on a regular basis — away from the kids, your friends, and family.

• Surround yourself with happily married friends who don't believe in fooling around. Having positive, emotionally connected role models will help you stay on track.